I'm ba-a-a-a-a-ack!

Yes, I know that has been almost two months.  And while I wish that I could tell you that I have just been way to busy working out and buying a whole new wardrobe to match my new exciting skinny figure, that would be a very very big lie.  I have been busy.  Life gets crazy most days.  I have been really bad about weighing in - mostly because I don't want to see the scale.  I haven't been exercising. I did NOT get down to 180 for my sister's wedding.  She looked beautiful.  And I looked decent, thank heavens I bought the size 18 dress though.  I have a pic that was taken with me and my sisters.  You can definitely tell who I am versus the others.  But that is okay.  I love them, even if they are skinny, beautiful and don't have gray hair or any wrinkles yet.  :) 

I was actually considering just abandoning this blog and my goals and just being happy as an overweight and unhealthy person.  I am still aware of what I am eating (especially the two pieces of chocolate cake that I ate last night).  My body lets me know when I have blown it ( like this morning) and I am trying to be good.  But then something happened.

My friend was having some health problems and had a biopsy done.  They found pre-cancerous cells in both of her ovaries.  That is not good.  Pre-cancerous doesn't mean NOT cancerous.  It just means that they are almost like teenage cancer cells - not quite old enough to be "legally" considered cancer.  Then the doctor told her that while she needs to have surgery to remove her ovaries, they can't do the surgery until she loses 60 - 85 lbs.  That is a lot of weight to lose.  And her life literally depends on her losing it. 

And it made me sad.  And it made me think.  While I am not nearly that overweight, and last I checked, all organs were fairly healthy, my friend is not.  My personality type is labeled as "The Giver".  I am happiest when I am helping someone else with something, anything (there are a few exceptions to that but not many).  However, one of the big downsides to the personality type is that we tend to feel that while others are worth the help that we give them, we are not "worthy" of that ourselves. 

I am noticing that flaw big time right now.  As I help my friend develop an eating plan, find recipes, and start slowly exercising, I am realizing that those are the things that I need to be doing for ME!  I am more than willing to go walking with her so that she will get physically active but I won't do it just for ME!  Kinda interesting.  Something to ask the therapist about I guess. 

But on the flip side, if that is what it takes to get me off my lazy rear-end, then it is working and I am grateful for it.  When I said we are starting slow, we are literally started last week at walking a 1/3 of a mile. It is all she can do right now.  This week, we are going to up it to a 1/2 mile and decrease our time by the end of the week.  Next week we'll work our way up to 3/4.  And the following week, we'll be up to a mile.  Our goal is to be up to 3 miles by the start of the school in the fall and by spring next year, to be able to jog the 3 miles instead of just walking them. 

But our main goal is for her to lose the weight in a healthy way, but as quickly as possible so she can have the surgery she needs.  When it comes right down to it, she can either choose to stay the way she is and die very early in life from cancer or she can make the changes she needs to and live.  I believe that she is choosing to live.  And I am too. 

So while my journey stalled for a while, I am back on track now with a renewed purpose.  I probably won't weigh in much but I will keep you updated on what I am learning and how she and I are both progressing. 

Love to you all!  If you have stalled in your journey, get started again with us.  We're taking it slow - you can too!